American (Girl) Dream

The other day, my husband said: "Your blog is pretty much an American Girl blog now." and I was like: "Yeeeaaahhhh..." Haha. I laughed, but actually sometimes I do feel a little embarrassed about how excited I am about dolls. I mean I'm 32, I get it. It's quirky. But I gotta be me, you know? And me loves dolls, I always have.

I write sponsored posts for AG every time they send me a doll, but I wanted to write a little post that wasn't sponsored, so you'd know how I authentically feel. (Which you already do, fyi, authenticity is kind of a thing with me.)

I always loved dolls as a little girl, any kind, every kind, but there was nothing more beautiful and sublimely perfect in my mind than the American Girl dolls. In particular, Samantha Parkington, who was not only the prettiest doll, but had my dream life: A large, elegant victorian mansion, formal dressing, piano lessons, an only child (haha), and endless lessons in manners and ladylike ways. I would have ROCKED that existence. But that $87 price tag back in the 1990's may as well have been $5,000 for my family, and to be honest, we couldn't even afford the books. So I got them from the library and read them over and over, even though I usually wouldn't pick up a book to save my life. I studied the illustrations like priceless works of art in a museum. I memorized Samantha's behavior and elegant ways. And the catalogs, OH those beautiful, glorious catalogs! I could have framed every page. Every product, every detail was utter perfection. I just knew I would never look my best until I was wearing one of Samantha's dresses for girls. The AGONY of not having them was almost too much to bear. Looking back, it must have hurt my mom's heart to hear me pining away knowing she could never get me one. But she never made me stop. She was kind like that.

So to fast forward 20 years or so, it was pretty special when Paige and I went to the Seattle AG store to get our first dolls. Remember that post? It was bittersweet, because we were over there to take our little Curly Fry (a sweet boy we took care of for a year) to meet his new foster parents. Our new dolls made it less strange and painful. A couple of years after that, American Girl started sending me samples of their new dolls as they came out, to review on Ruffles and Stuff. Can you say DREAM COME TRUE?? I seriously...I know it sounds strange, but you just have no idea what it means to me, and how special it is. Not only because, well, gorgeous new dollies, but also, and mostly, because it feels like a special gift, straight from God. I almost don't even think of them as from American Girl. When the box comes, the return address should just say "Heaven". As you all know, my heart has been through a lot of pain in the last few years with the loss of my sister, and my father leaving, & etc., and these dolls, these toys...are so much more than that to me. It's like God brought me flowers to say "I'm sorry, feel better." Does that make sense? During this season of sadness, I've seen so many little (but big) gifts like that from God. And I love it so much, because he knows life has really hard times and it has to be like that, but he comforts us in the ways that are just right for us. And I'm so thankful!

So that's why I post about my dolls. They're special to me. :O)

Love you, dear people!

-Disney